Hard Luck Woman
by Code Delphi
Summary: Three years after Spike has left the Syndicate, Julia is living with Vicious, and weary of her life of murder and political intrigue. What will she do when faced again with the heart-rending decisions from her past? (SxF, SxJ, SxV, VxJ, JxF) X3;
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

* * *

There was something soothing and deeply melancholy about rainfall on half-open windows, with the old lace curtains fluttering in the cool breeze, much like the tattered edges of the memory they brought to life. Julia remembered a room like this one, the light dim and grey, the coffee tepid in it's untouched mug. 

It had been raining on that particular day as well, and it was almost painful to hear the footsteps of another weary person returning to their apartment, just next to hers. The slow-paced rhythm was so much like Spike's had been, and she had known just from the slow creaking of the door that something was wrong. 

His usually warm, expressive brown eyes had been dull and averted from hers that day, and as she'd twined her delicate fingers in his strong ones, their customary handclasp was absent. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by the muffled arguments of the couple next door, and inadvertently she winced, glancing at the clock on the wall. Only an hour until Vicious returned. They'd been living together for so long now, his cold, emotionless presense was just another everpresent shadow in her life. 

Thinking of him, she unconsciously played with the seam of her long skirt, twisting the edge in agitation. Vicious did this to her; stirred up a turmoil of uncertainty and conflicting emotions, so that she scarcely knew what she wanted anymore. She couldn't remember if her dreams had ever been bright, and now all she had was the dubious future of a Syndicate-owned killer, without the man that made this burden on her conscience almost tolerable. 

Vicious would laugh at her own hypocritical morals, she knew. Years spent in violence hardened a person past caring about things like innocence and loved ones left behind. But even Spike, who could blow away life after life without flinching, had cared. That's why he had left. And she had been too cowardly to go with him. 

This was what had truly held her captive these four years. Guilt was a far stronger shackle than Vicious's threats, and the almost certain death that awaited anyone foolish enough to leave the Syndicate. 

Had Spike been foolish, then, to fly to the nether regions of Space, abandoning the organization that had owned his life as they had so many others? Sometimes Julia thought so, on those days she watched the betrayers being publically tortured. _Look what he risked_, she'd think bitterly, unflinching as she saw her comrades crushed, maimed, or otherwise unpleasantly killed; their blood and bruised organs splattering the walls like grisly paint. 

But other nights, when she lay caught in Vicious's hard embrace, subdued and shivering naked in strong arms that gave no warmth, she laughed at herself, and her own choices. _At least Spike has his freedom._ Despite her own suffering, and the tormented existence she had numbed herself to, a small part of her was unspeakably glad that wherever he was, he was happy, and free of the bonds that had chafed them both. 

_Author's Notes_: I hope you enjoyed the prologue, and please Review, because nothing motivates an author to write like feedback. There will be straight, shonen & shoujo ai pairings in this story, in an effort to please everybody. First chapter coming soon. 


	2. Chapter One

**Chapter One**

* * *

_"Spike, welcome back." She smiled that rare, warm smile for him, only for him. Returning it, his bi-colored eyes were momentarily the same shade of warm brown, his love for her evident within them. She saw his coat and hair both damp from the outside rain, and a burn on one sleeve that had not been there before. Usually they partnered on missions, but lately, Spike had been sent with a new recruit, someone he'd befriended and trained himself. _

"Julia," he said, and that was all the invitation she needed before rushing into his waiting arms, that strong embrace that always smelled of blood and gunpowder. They both lived killer's lives, neither denied it, but the love they shared was untainted by such things; a pure, fragile thing to be cherished and protected. Even though she did not accomany him on Syndicate business anymore, they both knew they could always return to this apartment, and find the other waiting there. 

She twined her arms about his neck and kissed him passionately, opening her mouth to him eagerly and locking tongues in a playful battle for dominance that he always won. For him she tossed aside the cold, reserved persona she wore like armor, and was transformed into the affectionate, passionate woman he loved. Her tempered-steel soul and calm nature complimented the fire that never failed to arouse him more fully than any woman he had known, and Spike Spiegal always marveled at just how complex a woman she was. 

One arm possessively about her waist, he moved them both to the bed, lying her down with a gentleness that didn't quite belie the fierce need he had of her, of her woman's touch. Shifting so as not to burden her with too much of his weight, he gripped her throat lightly in a show of mock-dominance, and kissed her deeply, leaving her breathless and panting as he withdrew. 

She pulled him down hard onto her body, arching against him and wrapping her leather-clad legs about his back. Biting hard into his throat, she marked and aroused him with her aggression. Leaning down on his elbows, he freed one hand to tangle in her long, silken gold strands, pulling her head back for another mind-jolting kiss. She felt the tingle run from her lips down to her belly in a languid, liquid crackle of energy, and already could feel her soft feminine parts dampening and swelling in response. 

Reaching down with his other hand, Spike soon discovered the same, and she released a breathy pant at the warmth of his breath against her newly-bared breasts. Goosebumps shivered their way down her arms and torso at his touch, soon followed by a violent quiver and gasp as Spike's hand wandered down further, skilled fingers bringing her quickly to full arousal, and aching for him to enter her. 

He waited a few agonizing moments more before doing so, and when she finally felt that hard heat sliding so deeply within her, her eyes filled with tears. He did this to her every time, and always this first moment of perfect union made her feel she could die of the pleasure. 

He moved for such a long time within her that she lost track, aware only of the moments between each blissful thrust, the few seconds of emtpiness before being filled again. And as he shuddered to a spectacular finish within her, and they both lay panting and spent in the tangled sheets, she knew that this kind of perfection could never last. She was right. 

_Author's Notes_: First lemon scene, and so many more to come, hopefully with enough room for the plot!! XD; If anyone is interested in beta reading, I'd love them to email me one of the two chapters revised by them (changes marked in a manner of their choosing). Please review, and the chapters will come out a lot more quickly, as I'll be more motivated to write them. 


	3. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

* * *

The click of the lock jolted her, and Julia flinched as the door opened, and Vicious stepped quietly inside. His long, pale hair was damp from the rain, his gaze expressionless as he glanced at her, eyes flicking down to the partially unbuttoned blouse she wore over the long skirt, and back to her face. She hated it when he looked at her like that, with predator's eyes and uncaring lust. That was the way he always seemed to see her, in fact, with none of the compassion or warmth Spike had given her. 

Stepping around the kitchen chair, he stopped behind her, gloved hands resting on her thin shoulders possessively. She felt his warm breath against the golden hair she had left unbrushed, and involuntarily shivered. She didn't need to turn to see the smirk that touched his pale lips, but did anyway, eyes flashing icily. He knew that she hated being caressed and fondled like a pet kitten, but was unaware that once, one man had been allowed to touch her tenderly. That same man that he hunted even now, his mentor and partner, Spike Spiegal. Vicious had known that the two were lovers, but could never guess at their intimacy, being unable to understand such emotions himself. 

After Spike, she had hardly remained chaste, but would allow no man to hold her like he cared, or touch her in any way except those neccessary to the act itself. But Vicious loved crossing those boundaries. He took great pleasure in doing so, knowing that she could not stop him, or would not from some obscure feeling of guilt; that she deserved his treatment. 

As she turned, her lips were caught and bruised by his, one of his hands lifting to tangle painfully in her hair and hold her there. The other reached down to grasp both wrists as she pushed against him, and she wondered why she even bothered to fight back. Time after time he had subdued and had her, but some stubborn trace of her woman's pride prevailed, and she could not surrender without feeling that she was accepting what he did. 

The hand holding her hair released it, and wandered down to trace the thin fabric of her blouse, before grasping her breast firmly, then falling to grip her waist. His gloved fingers, like icy claws, dug into her flesh. Vicious smelled of death and decay, and reeked of sins uncared about and left to fester in the nearly dead lump of flesh that was his heart. 

"Today we eradicated another of those petty drug lords, and his family. The Syndicate is always tightening its coils, strangling the scum that oppose us. You'll be moving on one of the few surviving gang members tomorrow, with me. There's a possibility he might know the location of some illegal substances the Syndicate could make use of. So it's preferred that we take him alive...." The last word was hissed, snakelike, displeasure in the command evident. Julia was not surprised. Vicious loved killing more than anything she knew of, except perhaps the power that accompanied his heinous deeds. 

She said nothing, averting her face as Vicious sought to catch her eyes with his reptillian ones. She would not give him the pleasure of seeing the faint horror she always felt when assigned to missions with him, knowing full well that if it served his purpose he would let her die, or kill her himself without hesitation. Then again, some of those days she almost hoped he would, or at least let her die from the carelessness of some of her actions. Raising her gun just a moment too slowly, not quite hiding herself from view as she shot at their victims. But he was always there to remedy these apathetic suicide attempts, eyes mocking as he kept her alive for another day of misery and abuse. 

Vicious slowly removed his belt, and the creak of leather and jangle of the metallic buckle sent a shiver of dread down Julia's spine. She knew what that sound meant, and knew that there was nothing to be done but endure it. Like a striking snake he was behind her, pulling her up from the chair and wrenching her arms behind her, securing the wrists tightly with the belt. She bloodied her lip to keep from crying out, and soon the sharp pain dulled to an aching numbness. 

Relentlessly he threw her on the bed, smirking as a small, choked cry of pain escaped her bitten lips. The glare she gave him then was hate-filled and bestial enough that he caught himself pausing, just for a moment, pinned by her gaze. Often he forgot, but was reminded by times like these that this woman was a predator too, and armed with a woman's guile besides. He musn't underestimate her. 

"I remember Spike giving me that same look once," he murmured, gravelly voice deceptively mild as he advanced on the helpless woman in his bed. "It was then that I killed him." He trailed off, and ran a cold finger down Julia's face, bringing it away damp with her tears. "You know, Spike always has defied the laws. He didn't stay dead, did he?" He leaned close, whispering in her ear, "But he never came back for you. I'm all you have left from the old days now, me and the Syndicate. Remember that Julia, and maybe I'll let you live long enough to see the betrayel on Spike's face when he discovers you're mine." 

"Enough." She spoke so quietly that the windchimes outside the door nearly drowned her voice in their gentle quivering. "You have me, so do it." 

And as he pressed his naked flesh against her own, she closed her eyes and drowned in the darkness once more. _I'm in Hell._

_Author's Notes_: A huge thank-you to Kyra1 for her support and suggested corrections, and to Kendra Luehr for her compliments and suggestion for naming the pairings in the summary. I didn't have enough room to type out full names, so I abbreviated. ; Not to mention just about _everyone_ is paired up, except for Ed or Jet, just because the second doesn't appeal to me, and the first would be just wrong. xX This forum is cluttered with Spike x Faye stories, so I just had to write one about Julia, obviously the woman Spike loved. I mean, come on, he never _once_ in the series shows any sort of attraction to Faye. Just because she has the biggest breasts, people have to toss her in every hentai as Spike's true love. Oy vey. 


End file.
